(And more WHY WOMEN DON'T LOVE YOU videos.)
I give you exhibit A:
Apparently, we can fix the economy by growing "stuff". You know, because "we need the food because its food and stuff." Gee, why didn't I think of that?! GENIUS! Go back to your job as a pole dancer. Or a as a hooker who caters to men with fetishes for women with massively large breasts, lumber-jack sized shoulders and itty bitty heads (I'm speaking from a physical standpoint here, but as evidenced in this speech, her brain size is relative.)
Perhaps if we cut California from our country and shoved it out to sea, our economy would pick up and a good deal of our problems would be solved? I'm just joking. Obviously, not everyone in Cali is stupid, and there are plenty of morons in other states. California is just large, therefore has double the room for people like this. My advice to better your reputation California? Keep your village idiots under lock and key. Or just give them some more colorful magazines to read to keep them occupied and away from public view.
Moving on, who is excited about Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland? Take a gander at some official photographs:
Johnny Depp looks so insane he might stab you in the skull and suck your brains through a straw without any notice. This is what Carrot Top would resemble should he ever turn into a flesh-eating zombie with zero fashion sense (Oh wait, Carrot Top is already lacking that skill.) Are some of those things on his hat little spears? Or perhaps poison darts? I'm voting poison darts. Everyone knows the best tasting tea is made from the livers of small, poisoned orphans.
Helena Bonham Carter has always been somewhat scary looking to me, but her make-up in this photo makes me want to hide between my mattresses. I sincerely hope that there is a bit of photo manipulation going on here to make her head so freakishly huge. She does, however, make a stunning rendition of the Queen of Hearts. Very intimidating, as is the story-book character.
Anne Hathaway is, as ever, beautiful and the least bizarre looking although she has that bloodless vampire appearance going on. All in all, it gives me the feeling that this will be your typical Tim Burton movie. Something with a twist and a bit of a dark (maybe even psychotic) touch. But then I've always loved Tim Burton films (except for Corpse Bride and Willy Wonka...dropped the ball a bit there I think.)
Beyond that, I have no Larry's Bitch of the Day as he has been pretty quiet (except for his continued insistence our dog is peeing in front of his bedroom door. I've never smelled such unscented dog pee before!) Perhaps our dog has a genetic anomaly that makes his pee smell plain. In that case, we should clone him and breed him and make thousands of little dogs with odor free pee. That would be a hit for people who keep dogs in their homes! *rolls eyes*
It has been ridiculously hot here, and we haven't done a THING lately! I did play DDR last evening after 7 p.m. for about an hour and a half straight. What a work out. I'm concerned that one of these days the cops will come knocking when the neighbors (the only neighbors in miles) call to complain about the fact that I pump DDR out on my giant amp.
Yet another example of WHY WOMEN DON'T LOVE YOU:
I could find videos of men failing in the romance department all day. This Aicha video is a classic, and is quite old...but never fails to amuse. There are several reasons women don't love you dude.
1. You are a pencil thin nerd just SWIMMING in those baggy clothes. Wear something that fits. Make an effort. That hair is not an honest effort. Learn how to style it from someone who knows what they are doing. You don't just stick gel on your fingers and then slap it in your hair. It looks like you stuck your finger in an electric socket.
2. You are laying on a bed covered in Mickey Mouse. Scratch that, MINNEY Mouse and you have a stack of cute little stuffed animals in the corner. This screams five years old or gay. Actually it screams five years old AND gay, or at least destined to be.
3. You can not sing or dance. All NSync or Backstreet Boys type moves are gay, and what is with the foo-foo cute doggy poster on your door? This entire thing screams corny, gay, and dorky. If you can't realize that, you need a reality check straight into a brick wall. Remember to wear a helmet. :)
I give you exhibit A:
Apparently, we can fix the economy by growing "stuff". You know, because "we need the food because its food and stuff." Gee, why didn't I think of that?! GENIUS! Go back to your job as a pole dancer. Or a as a hooker who caters to men with fetishes for women with massively large breasts, lumber-jack sized shoulders and itty bitty heads (I'm speaking from a physical standpoint here, but as evidenced in this speech, her brain size is relative.)
Perhaps if we cut California from our country and shoved it out to sea, our economy would pick up and a good deal of our problems would be solved? I'm just joking. Obviously, not everyone in Cali is stupid, and there are plenty of morons in other states. California is just large, therefore has double the room for people like this. My advice to better your reputation California? Keep your village idiots under lock and key. Or just give them some more colorful magazines to read to keep them occupied and away from public view.
Moving on, who is excited about Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland? Take a gander at some official photographs:
Johnny Depp looks so insane he might stab you in the skull and suck your brains through a straw without any notice. This is what Carrot Top would resemble should he ever turn into a flesh-eating zombie with zero fashion sense (Oh wait, Carrot Top is already lacking that skill.) Are some of those things on his hat little spears? Or perhaps poison darts? I'm voting poison darts. Everyone knows the best tasting tea is made from the livers of small, poisoned orphans.
Helena Bonham Carter has always been somewhat scary looking to me, but her make-up in this photo makes me want to hide between my mattresses. I sincerely hope that there is a bit of photo manipulation going on here to make her head so freakishly huge. She does, however, make a stunning rendition of the Queen of Hearts. Very intimidating, as is the story-book character.
Anne Hathaway is, as ever, beautiful and the least bizarre looking although she has that bloodless vampire appearance going on. All in all, it gives me the feeling that this will be your typical Tim Burton movie. Something with a twist and a bit of a dark (maybe even psychotic) touch. But then I've always loved Tim Burton films (except for Corpse Bride and Willy Wonka...dropped the ball a bit there I think.)
Beyond that, I have no Larry's Bitch of the Day as he has been pretty quiet (except for his continued insistence our dog is peeing in front of his bedroom door. I've never smelled such unscented dog pee before!) Perhaps our dog has a genetic anomaly that makes his pee smell plain. In that case, we should clone him and breed him and make thousands of little dogs with odor free pee. That would be a hit for people who keep dogs in their homes! *rolls eyes*
It has been ridiculously hot here, and we haven't done a THING lately! I did play DDR last evening after 7 p.m. for about an hour and a half straight. What a work out. I'm concerned that one of these days the cops will come knocking when the neighbors (the only neighbors in miles) call to complain about the fact that I pump DDR out on my giant amp.
Yet another example of WHY WOMEN DON'T LOVE YOU:
I could find videos of men failing in the romance department all day. This Aicha video is a classic, and is quite old...but never fails to amuse. There are several reasons women don't love you dude.
1. You are a pencil thin nerd just SWIMMING in those baggy clothes. Wear something that fits. Make an effort. That hair is not an honest effort. Learn how to style it from someone who knows what they are doing. You don't just stick gel on your fingers and then slap it in your hair. It looks like you stuck your finger in an electric socket.
2. You are laying on a bed covered in Mickey Mouse. Scratch that, MINNEY Mouse and you have a stack of cute little stuffed animals in the corner. This screams five years old or gay. Actually it screams five years old AND gay, or at least destined to be.
3. You can not sing or dance. All NSync or Backstreet Boys type moves are gay, and what is with the foo-foo cute doggy poster on your door? This entire thing screams corny, gay, and dorky. If you can't realize that, you need a reality check straight into a brick wall. Remember to wear a helmet. :)
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